Chapter 46

"Not long. We let you come back on your own. It took just a few minutes."

"What do you think?"

"I live in two worlds," Brenda said, "like my mother, and your great-grandmother. I inherited, and learned from, the spirit world. I learned medicine in a university. I can't avoid looking at everything from both sides, both worlds. Like many of my people who have chosen to live outside the reservation. It's not easy at the best of times, when you know that the world you are spending most of your time in is a false construct, I have to make hard decisions.

"I love people, all people. Not just my Indian ancestors, all people. I'm a nurse because I want to help those who are in need. But I know what what the world has become is evil, beyond even what we know. And we know a lot.

"I often look at the alternative, for people like my Cherokee ancestors. Was it better for the aboriginal society to be the permanent state of humanity? I don't think so, otherwise we wouldn't change. Civilization, and the technology that goes with it, makes a lot of things better for a lot of people. Unfortunately it is often misused. So I do what I can, where I can. On the reservation of in the city, using approved medicine where I have to, if it works. And in other ways, if needed."

That means something. But what?"

"My ancestry, or the teachings of my ancestors, or both perhaps, give me unique abilities to see things." Brenda said. "And my medical experience makes it possible to use both together. It's an unusual combination. I know a couple of other native American doctors whose experience is similar to mine, and they use it discreetly to help those they can.

"In your case, Alex, you've been on the receiving end of some of the worst things that can happen." Brenda said. "You seem to have been the victim of the worst of combination of corruption and incompetence."

"You have, as near as I can tell, at least a dozen dangerous psychopharmaceutical drugs used on you. Together with all the other things they typically use in cases like yours, especially inept doctors, there were probably all kinds of antibiotics, anything they think solves a particular problem they think you have."

"They did." Jessica said. "Lots of them."

"And each one adds to the damage. Permanent damage in some cases. I don't want to scare you, you've done well, and I believe you'll continue to recover. Maybe someday there won't be enough left to bother you. I hope so, it seems they were not only ignorant but didn't care. For whatever reason."

"We suspect fraud." said Jessica. "You know about LTACH fraud?"

"I've heard about it. Operators of long-term care facilities, keep patients in there for the money, even if they don't need to be there. Nursing homes are notorious for exploiting elderly people, so it's not surprising that hospitals do it. Excessive stays have always been a problem. You have a patient with the flu or pneumonia, they're over it in five or six days, you keep them a couple more. Hundreds of dollars a day, thousands actually these days. The temptation is too great for many."

"Apparently it's quite the thing these days." Jessica said. "We think this hospital was set up for just that purpose."

"That's evil," Brenda said, "but it doesn't surprise me. It's an ugly world we're living in."

"What's my real-world prognosis?" Alex asked.

"Actually pretty good. You have a strong mind and a strong spirit, and apparently a strong and resilient body. It's hard to say how close you'll get to a hundred percent of where you were. Those chemicals do permanent damage, and how much you are able to overcome it, depends on that inner strength you have. And you have a lot.

"To be honest, I've rarely seen that sort of strength in anyone. I've worked with burn victims, or survivors of awful accidents, people who statistically shouldn't have survived. In those cases their bodies could never be completely restored, but their spirit was strong enough to overcome it.

"And you shouldn't have survived, statistically. But you did, and you're recovering. That's something more. Destiny I suppose. That should tell you something."

I didn't ask for it. Or did I?

"I sometimes don't know how far to pursue the... the mystical side." Brenda said. "But the more I experience, as time goes by, the more I'm inclined to follow it, on faith I suppose. If that makes any sense."

"Yeah. I've been out there. Wherever there is." Alex said. "You've helped me a lot. Probably more than you know."

Or more than I know. Got a feeling this gonna be a long trip for an old man."

"I'm glad I was able to. Our folks, have always been a pretty good bunch. I've explored our history some, and I believe there are strains of humanity, running along family lines, that have a destiny, or a purpose at least. We may never to spectacular things, like affecting the fate of nations or whatever, but in our small way we serve a higher purpose. We may never understand it in this life, but we know it."

"Yeah." Alex said. "I'm feeling some of it, don't know where it's likely to go. But it has to be done, there's others out there, don't know. Don't know what's happening, even less what to do about it."

"We're better off, in some ways," Brenda said, "than those who don't get... awakened I guess. But it works out better in the end. You're more aware, experiencing your life at a... a higher level of consciousness you could say, and painful as it may be at times, you know you're better off."

"Stay in touch." Brenda said. "I'd like to see how this turns out. And let me know if I can help in any way. You guys want to get some lunch?"

"Let's do it." Jessica said, smiling. "Ready, Alex?"